Monday night I was talking with Piotr who told me that his father was a pastor during communism in Western Ukraine. He talked about having to meet in several locations and when the police came and arrested his dad. As I listened, I was sickened by the reality that this was real life. It wasn't the game that someone in the US created to help teens understand the underground church, but that I know people who have lived this. Understandably, the game helps us associate tangibly with struggles of others, but it sickens me now to think of how we almost make fun of finding out who is 'KGB' and who can be trusted and who cannot. It is not a game. It is real life to believers all over the world. It is life, not a game.
The second harsh reality was when we took Operation Christmas Child gifts into the Chernobyl region. We visited two schools with a total of around 250 students. There is still a 'dead' zone where the roads are closed and the cities/villages are completely empty. Buildings have caved in roofs, all of the belongings are gone -- it is like something that you see in movies, not in real life. While we did not travel into the dead zone, we were in a village approximately 10 kilometers from the dead zone.
It reminded me of my first visits to Ukraine. Cold and dark rooms. Students that did not know that the Bible is a book filled with stories about God. Kids who had never heard the song Jesus loves me.
When I prayed for dinner last night, I told God that I didn't have words. I didn't know what to pray for except that He would protect them from the daily hazards that they live with and that He would touch their little lives with His grace. That somehow He would continually give them interaction with people that would serve as His hands and feet to show them how much He loves them.
Friday, December 22, 2006
Reading Noah's Ark to Artur. Atleast I can translate most simple children's books into Russian now when I read to them! 
Luba Kulbich and I. She calls me her little bird, which you can obviously see is funny just because of the fact that she comes barely to my shoulder!
Some of the team at Ukrainian Center for Christian Cooperation patiently waiting for the party to start. 
Sincerely Yours
When I was about 16 years old I sang a song called 'Sincerely Yours' at church. This morning while I was getting ready for a Christmas Party, God brought this song back to me out of the blue. All day, while traveling, enjoying friends, talking, serving, waiting in line, all day I've been thinking about the words. I want to share them and some of my reflection from today:
Lord, I take my pen to write to you a letter
Knowing even now you know what's on my mind
But I think perhaps it might make me feel better
if I see myself here written in a line
And as I close I see a phrase I've took for granted
And it leaps out as I see it written there
And as the truth of it begins to become implanted
These two words have now become my heartfelt prayer
Sincerely Yours
Lord, I sign my life to you
Sincerely Yours
With a strong and honest wish to be the best that I can be at what I am
Without a thought for me
Lord teach me now to be... Sincerely Yours
Without a proud or selfish line
Sincerely Yours
From now until there is no time
Please make my life become a letter you can keep and never throw away
I'll write it till the day that I become
Sincerely Yours... Sincerely Yours...Sincerely Yours.
As I wrestle with how does Ukraine and my love for the people here fit into what God wants for me, this song brought me to my knees this morning. It's always interesting to remember songs sung and lessons taught and then see the circumstances and life events that God brings across my path following them. So, today I reflected on what does 'sincerely yours' to God look like? I've had moments, hours, days where I was sincerely sold out to God, but honestly monthly and yearly consistency is almost impossible, isn't it? So, I revisited my life's letter today.
I am ashamed by the selfishness and am humbled through so many friends life experiences here in Ukraine. I am amazed at the many open doors here for ministry.
I think about jobs, things I've occupied my time with; some profitable and many others not...
I am reminded of God's grace. That only because He first loved me that I am His.
That I yearn for God's voice in my daily life. That I depend on Him to bring people into my life who need His touch. And, that even in my disappointment in others and changes in ministry focus that He is in control and knows what is best for me and that He orchestrates what is ahead. In my delusion of control and self direction, only He knows what is in store, whether it's 1 hour or 10 years ahead.
So, today I take my pen and write again a letter to God and sign it simply, Sincerely Yours.
Lord, I take my pen to write to you a letter
Knowing even now you know what's on my mind
But I think perhaps it might make me feel better
if I see myself here written in a line
And as I close I see a phrase I've took for granted
And it leaps out as I see it written there
And as the truth of it begins to become implanted
These two words have now become my heartfelt prayer
Sincerely Yours
Lord, I sign my life to you
Sincerely Yours
With a strong and honest wish to be the best that I can be at what I am
Without a thought for me
Lord teach me now to be... Sincerely Yours
Without a proud or selfish line
Sincerely Yours
From now until there is no time
Please make my life become a letter you can keep and never throw away
I'll write it till the day that I become
Sincerely Yours... Sincerely Yours...Sincerely Yours.
As I wrestle with how does Ukraine and my love for the people here fit into what God wants for me, this song brought me to my knees this morning. It's always interesting to remember songs sung and lessons taught and then see the circumstances and life events that God brings across my path following them. So, today I reflected on what does 'sincerely yours' to God look like? I've had moments, hours, days where I was sincerely sold out to God, but honestly monthly and yearly consistency is almost impossible, isn't it? So, I revisited my life's letter today.
I am ashamed by the selfishness and am humbled through so many friends life experiences here in Ukraine. I am amazed at the many open doors here for ministry.
I think about jobs, things I've occupied my time with; some profitable and many others not...
I am reminded of God's grace. That only because He first loved me that I am His.
That I yearn for God's voice in my daily life. That I depend on Him to bring people into my life who need His touch. And, that even in my disappointment in others and changes in ministry focus that He is in control and knows what is best for me and that He orchestrates what is ahead. In my delusion of control and self direction, only He knows what is in store, whether it's 1 hour or 10 years ahead.
So, today I take my pen and write again a letter to God and sign it simply, Sincerely Yours.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
A friend has been spoiling me by painting - actually designing my nails almost weekly. We have fun talking while she is creatively designing my 'look' for the week!
We learned how to make blinni this weekend! For those who have never tasted this treat, my favorite version is filled with a sweet cream cheese and then served with warm raspberry jam. They are very similar to crepes. Yummmmmm!
Students comment on our little tree that they can see through the window. It's been fun to spread a little dose of Christmas cheer!
Jingle Bells...
Christmas in Irpine with friends.
Lena and I just after the Christmas concert on Saturday night.
I'm peaking at the Operation Christmas Child Shoe Box gifts that are being distributed to children all over Ukraine. What a great, tangible way to demonstrate that God sent His son as a gift to mankind at Chrsitmas time!
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Wrapping things up
It's so bizarre to be completely removed from our over materialized holiday traditions in the States. It's been enlightening and refreshing to not see commercials for everything under the sun or have newspapers stuffed with ads to entice you to buy more. There are a few Christmas decorations and lights up in businesses here, but the lines are still manageable. Today it is around 40 degrees and the sun is shining brightly! No snow in the recent past or in the upcoming forecast that I'm aware of.
It is also bizarre to have completed teaching the missions course and English Composition classes this past week. There are papers and tests to grade, but that experience is quickly coming to an end. We also completed our semester of Russian classes on Friday. By the grace of God we know quite a bit more Russian than when we landed. Now, the hard part, to practice what I've learned!
This weekend we are headed to Irpine to stay with a family that are friends form church. There is a choir sing celebration for Christmas that should be fun. It will be relaxing to get away after the busyness of this past week.
Even though I rag on our materialism, when I visit American missionaries homes with their Christmas decorations up there is a pang of wishing I could be with all of you for the Christmas season. I am enjoying understanding another cultures rich holiday traditions and spending time with friends here as well.
It is also bizarre to have completed teaching the missions course and English Composition classes this past week. There are papers and tests to grade, but that experience is quickly coming to an end. We also completed our semester of Russian classes on Friday. By the grace of God we know quite a bit more Russian than when we landed. Now, the hard part, to practice what I've learned!
This weekend we are headed to Irpine to stay with a family that are friends form church. There is a choir sing celebration for Christmas that should be fun. It will be relaxing to get away after the busyness of this past week.
Even though I rag on our materialism, when I visit American missionaries homes with their Christmas decorations up there is a pang of wishing I could be with all of you for the Christmas season. I am enjoying understanding another cultures rich holiday traditions and spending time with friends here as well.
Monday, December 11, 2006
Geography is irrelevant
My screensaver on my laptop is ‘As you are going’. As it bounces around on my screen everyday, I am reminded of the commission given broadly to believers by Jesus just before His ascent to heaven. I remember understanding while preparing to speak to a group of high school students last year the vast command and the specific implications in my life. Every time someone in Ukraine introduces me as a missionary from Michigan I smile. Even though I have always tried to live out my faith deliberately with those that God places in my path, living oversees for a semester has definitely brought a new perspective to making disciples as I am going or as I am living my life. This is perhaps the starkest revelation to me in Ukraine is simply that I am living life. Different location, similar daily struggles, similar day to day annoyances, and similar joys and triumphs. In Retreat with the Psalms, the authors speak of a woman who spends time in a monastery. She reflects that you can’t dress perfectly either outwardly or inwardly when you go to church numerous times everyday. It is the realness of life with a God who knows all of my strengths, weaknesses, challenges and triumphs before they even happen. It is about the sincerity of my heart before a Holy God as I struggle to live out His Kingdom while learning a different culture. It is about learning some new aspects of how I am created as I live outside of my comfort zone and appreciate some of our cultural differences.
For those of you who are counting the days... I am flying home on Tuesday, January 16. I beleive my flight lands in Grand Rapids at 4:18 pm.
For those of you who are counting the days... I am flying home on Tuesday, January 16. I beleive my flight lands in Grand Rapids at 4:18 pm.
Sunday, December 03, 2006
Who put the mouse in the mashrutka?
It's been a bit of a whirlwind since we returned a week ago from our Thanksgiving holiday in Poland. On our journey home to Ukraine, both Sarah and I had the flu... Not fun... I will not elaborate. But, after about 16 hours of sleep, we both were feeling much better.
On Wednesday night we celebrated our 3rd and final Thanksgiving dinner in Ukraine. We cooked all afternoon, this time managing not to blow any fuses and enjoyed one last time of sharing a bit of our holiday tradition with our friends. It has been interesting to make such an extended holiday out of Thanksgiving. Some of the Christmas/New Year's Decorations are up in Kiev, but it is a welcome change not to have the commercialism everywhere like in the states.
Language class continues for another 2 weeks. Steady progress is a continued blessing and our friends anticipate more and more understanding as they challenge us daily with conversations that they are certain we can understand in Russian.
This Sunday was a milestone for me as it was the first time I sang with the choir at Bucha church, all in Russian and Ukrainian. I've been practicing for a while with them and I guess they were finally ready to let me try it. No major blunders, so we were all happy!
I also sang 'I know my Redeemer Lives' on Sunday morning. Once in a while as you are preparing a sermon/lesson/song it is amazing how God brings life circumstances to light. On Friday morning I was riding on a mashrutka/bus and I was listening to this song. I was in a seat that faced the rest of the passengers. As I listened to Nicole C. Mullin sing about the hope and faith of our redeemer, I looked in the faces of despair, filled with the drudgery of everyday life. I often pray for God to break my heart with the things that break His heart, and as I looked at the bus full of Ukrainians, it broke my heart that they live in a place where the government attempted to remove God for decades and now the aftermath is seen in a culture that has less than 5% evangelicals in a city that grows at a rate of approximately 600,000 people a year. My redeemer is their only hope. My favorite 2 lines of the song are: I know he's alive because I spoke with Him this morning... He's alive, I've got to tell everybody... and The same hands that hold me when I'm broken have conquered death and bring me victory! Well, I guess that's 3 lines. It's a great song.
Oh... the humor of the week was a mashrutka/bus ride from the outreach office to the subway. I got on and noticed that everyone was grouped towards the front. A little odd, but not horribly alarming. Then a babushka (grandmother) sitting across from me started pointing and shrieking. The driver started chastising her and out of the corner of my eye, I see a little mouse running under the seats up to the front somewhere. I did what any normal human being would do and put my feet on the seat, which incurred them all yelling at me -- I forgot myself -- a social fau pau here -- so, I chose to ride the rest of the way with my feet up in the air. Thankfully the mouse must have been frightened by the woman's shrieking and stayed put. Wherever he went. Many Ukrainians have assured me that this is a rare occurrence - in fact, I have not found anyone else who has ever encountered the same experience. Figures...
Thanks again for your prayers and emails! My challenge is simply to ask God to let you see people in your daily life as He sees them. I realize none of you have a mashrutka ride to work, but as you do your Christmas shopping, get fuel, eat in restaurants, interact with your neighbors... Whoever God brings across your path, see them as God sees them.
On Wednesday night we celebrated our 3rd and final Thanksgiving dinner in Ukraine. We cooked all afternoon, this time managing not to blow any fuses and enjoyed one last time of sharing a bit of our holiday tradition with our friends. It has been interesting to make such an extended holiday out of Thanksgiving. Some of the Christmas/New Year's Decorations are up in Kiev, but it is a welcome change not to have the commercialism everywhere like in the states.
Language class continues for another 2 weeks. Steady progress is a continued blessing and our friends anticipate more and more understanding as they challenge us daily with conversations that they are certain we can understand in Russian.
This Sunday was a milestone for me as it was the first time I sang with the choir at Bucha church, all in Russian and Ukrainian. I've been practicing for a while with them and I guess they were finally ready to let me try it. No major blunders, so we were all happy!
I also sang 'I know my Redeemer Lives' on Sunday morning. Once in a while as you are preparing a sermon/lesson/song it is amazing how God brings life circumstances to light. On Friday morning I was riding on a mashrutka/bus and I was listening to this song. I was in a seat that faced the rest of the passengers. As I listened to Nicole C. Mullin sing about the hope and faith of our redeemer, I looked in the faces of despair, filled with the drudgery of everyday life. I often pray for God to break my heart with the things that break His heart, and as I looked at the bus full of Ukrainians, it broke my heart that they live in a place where the government attempted to remove God for decades and now the aftermath is seen in a culture that has less than 5% evangelicals in a city that grows at a rate of approximately 600,000 people a year. My redeemer is their only hope. My favorite 2 lines of the song are: I know he's alive because I spoke with Him this morning... He's alive, I've got to tell everybody... and The same hands that hold me when I'm broken have conquered death and bring me victory! Well, I guess that's 3 lines. It's a great song.
Oh... the humor of the week was a mashrutka/bus ride from the outreach office to the subway. I got on and noticed that everyone was grouped towards the front. A little odd, but not horribly alarming. Then a babushka (grandmother) sitting across from me started pointing and shrieking. The driver started chastising her and out of the corner of my eye, I see a little mouse running under the seats up to the front somewhere. I did what any normal human being would do and put my feet on the seat, which incurred them all yelling at me -- I forgot myself -- a social fau pau here -- so, I chose to ride the rest of the way with my feet up in the air. Thankfully the mouse must have been frightened by the woman's shrieking and stayed put. Wherever he went. Many Ukrainians have assured me that this is a rare occurrence - in fact, I have not found anyone else who has ever encountered the same experience. Figures...
Thanks again for your prayers and emails! My challenge is simply to ask God to let you see people in your daily life as He sees them. I realize none of you have a mashrutka ride to work, but as you do your Christmas shopping, get fuel, eat in restaurants, interact with your neighbors... Whoever God brings across your path, see them as God sees them.
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